Win Some, Lose Some

Aaagghhh

Having contractions and my toddler is driving me crazy with fussing and clinging like he knows am about to fucking pop a baby out. Omfg am so annoyed. Just want some alone time to deal with these contractions.

Any day now…

So I noticed a change and it looks like spotting so I called my doctor to see if I should call out of work tomorrow cuz i don’t want this baby to come while I am at work. I think I will call out just in case.

Just die

Dear neighbors who decide to start making noise at fucking mid night every Friday. Fucking drop dead and shut the Fuck up. I have work in 7 hours and have to be up in 5. I fucking just fell asleep and woke up to hahaha chat chat chat. Just go die somewhere. Please!

I don’t want to work anymore….

So it’s become increasingly difficult to work. I can barely walk the hallways and yesterday I had contractions from four in the evening until after eight at night when I left and was able to sit in the car while my husband drove us home. It’s not the real contractions where you know ok baby is coming now, just those fake practice ones that are worrying because they can turn into real ones.

I had them today as well and it makes me worried that I indeed will go into labor while at work. Disgusting, full of germs, go die under a bush, work.
Who wants to have a baby when they’ve been taking care of sick and contagious people all day? Gross.

PMS Plumbing

A van I passed on way to work just now. XD I wonder what their slogan is…..

Ugh…

I am at that stage in pregnancy where I am swollen, my feet and legs hurt, my belly hurts, I am nauseous, I don’t get any sleep, and I pee myself every time I cough, sneeze, or fart. I really don’t want to be taking care of sick people right now. I would much prefer someone taking care of me instead.

Stupid policies

So i found out that since I haven’t worked with the company for a whole year yet I can’t get the full three months maternity leave that i was counting on. I only get a month and a half. :’( this means that I will have to return to work when baby is still feeding every one to two hours. I don’t even have time to pee when i need to or eat when i need to when i am at work- I find it impossible to even think of pumping breast milk every 2-4 hours to prevent mastitis. Mastitis is a very painful condition in which the milk builds up in the breasts and get s infected. Highly painful.

I am also saddened by the prospect of leaving my vulnerable little angel so soon in life to go expose myself to germs and hospital grossness.

Plus there’s the fact that i will still be driving an hour to get to work, an hours to get home, and breast feeding baby throughout night. How the hell am i supposed to function for a twelve hour shift after breast feeding every two hours through the night?

If I had the full three months i could train her to feed every four hours by then and it wouldn’t be so bad. Sigh. I am just so fed up with the whole being pregnant and working and having babies thing. Wish I could win a shit load of money from lotto and quit my job for like six months.

Also, to top it all off, my leave cannot begin until I drop baby out. I am expected to work until I go into labor. I just hope I am not at work when that happens because i don’t want to be all dirty and gross to bring a baby into the world. Plus they still give me patients who are in isolation because of highly contagious infections that are really hard to get rid of.

Sometimes I really am tempted to be one of those girls who refuse to work and just live off of the state. No stupid medical bills and work restrictions and isolation patients. Just stay home with my kids and live off other peoples money. Ugh.